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Karen Kyle McMahan

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Binocular Vision not Monocular Vision: Increasing Your Knowledge of Yourself and Your Partner

Although we all agree in theory that our partners have their own point of view and their own valid perception of interactions, at the emotional level, we are reluctant to accept this simple truth. We like to believe that the way we see the world is the way the world is. When our partner disagrees with us, it is tempting to think that they have a distorted point of view or are ill-informed. 

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Effective Communication for Couples

Effective communication involves two steps:  one person expresses themselves accurately, and the other person listens, understands, and validates.  Otherwise known as the Couple two-step (Fruzetti) One person leading (talking about whats going on for them) while the other person follows (listening and validating), then they switch.  This provides an solid foundation for effective communication.

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Recognizing the Blame-Withraw Cycle in your relationship

The person we most love and feel the safest with, is also the person that can bring us down into despair.  And it generally takes remarkably little to send us crashing down.  A slight change of facial expression, an off kilter tone, or careless remark may be all it takes.  It is the very connection with our partner that creates such vulnerability and potential for problems.  If misread, these signals escalate into conflicts that cause such destruction, it could lead to the end of the relationship. However, if this connection is strengthened with safety and awareness, then true intimacy can be achieved.

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